More On Cooking Dangerously

Iron sharpens iron...

One of the things about internet networking is that it allows geeks of a feather to flock together. When I talk about the stuff that interests me and what I'm doing to most people, I can see their eyes start to glaze over. Not too many people want to discuss starches, acrylamides, and microbiota. I try to restrain myself. Really. I try. I don't always succeed. Bless their hearts. Which is why I like clatching with other people who like to talk about what fermenting does for food.

Okay, I'll admit I'm getting lazy about food these days. I've got a groove. The Hobbits are stable, for the most part. I'm a little dicey on how Princess is doing of late, but time will tell. I've got a repertoire of What Works for us, I don't have to think about it, and I've even got the Hobbits doing more of their own cooking. It's not unknown for Bug to make breakfast for everyone and they all know how to reheat things. But once in a while something will snag my attention, like it did earlier this month.

See, the thing is that french fries have been a bit of a guilty indulgence around here. I still haven't shed the whole "fried is bad" dogma. Plus when the Hobbits had to go grain-free, it was the one snack that saved my sanity. Even when they were sugar-free and low glycemic, I made them fries. They didn't seem to react, still healed up, and it was the Very One thing that they had access to that other kids would drool over. I would feel guilty twinges from time to time, but squashed them by comparisons to the quality of the rest of their diet. Besides, it was only once or twice a week.

This past summer, things stepped up a notch socially. Dog is in that tweener age and is yearning to do tweener stuff. Give me strength. It's like trying to take a sip from a fire hydrant. I'm drowning in reminders of why we cocooned ourselves during their most sensitive years. Everything centers around food. Every activity has a snack. Or candy. Blerg. Yeah, I've got my repertoire. Yummy Earth rocks. And they make gummy bears now, too, bless them. And Endangered Species Dark Chocolate Bug Bites. What Hobbit doesn't clamor for these at every opportunity? I've got my cookie recipes and there are even a few commercial things that have come on the market that are within our grasp. But how much sugar does a Hobbit need? In fact, Dog actually communicated to me that the cookies just weren't cutting it and he preferred the pricier Boomi Bars. Of course he would.

So I drifted back to the fries and, since a mother has to harbor guilt over something, I felt guilty over all of the acrylamides that I was packing in the snack boxes at each outing. Until now. It pays to have equally geeky food friends who contemplate such issues themselves and post about them on email lists. It seems that someone out there has done a study on fermenting french fries. Yep. Read that right. Fermented fries. Who'da thunk? I found I was up for another bout of Cooking Dangerously.

Fermented Fries

Since these will need time to ferment, you'll need to plan a 2-3 day lead before you need to fry these up. I make my fries on Wednesday, so I start on Sunday or Monday.

Using the 1 mm blade on the food processor, slice potatoes. After slicing the first time, stack the slices up like cards in a deck and reinsert them on their sides into the processor sleeve. Run through again. After slicing, rinse under running cold water until the water is completely clear.

A couple of batches has revealed to me that I prefer to use covered containers for fermenting. I did one covered and one not covered and the uncovered one acquired an unpleasant smell. In lieu of a harsch crock, gallon glass jars with saucers over the top work nicely. My prior procedure was to soak the potatoes in water in the fridge. The fermenting procedure is wonderfully liberating to my cold storage space. In a salt solution of 2 T Real Salt per gallon water, I submerge the potatoes in water, cover and leave for 2-3 days, until I'm ready to use them. How easy is that?

When ready to fry, pour off salt solution, rinse thoroughly and allow to drain completely. I use a large dutch oven over the blowtorch burner on my stove. Tool Guy is partial to the Fry Daddy. What can I say? Boys and their toys. Over the years, I've used a few kinds of oil, but the most satisfying has been Spectrum palm shortening or just plain lard. Actually, the lard is the best. Hey, everyone agrees that McDonald's fries haven't been the same since they changed the oil, right? I heat the oil until a raw fry dropped in immediately bubbles to the surface. Then I add fries until just above the oil and leave to fry, stirring about half way through the fry cycle to loosen them. On my stove, it usually takes 15-20 minutes for a batch this size to sufficiently brown. I scoop them out with a basket strainer, drain, and dump them to cool on paper towels.

Being an advocate of guerrilla nutrition, I mentioned nothing of my experiment to the Hobbits. I couldn't taste a difference in the finished product. They weren't sour. They munched and crunched just as they had with my regular soaked fries. Hey, if it quacks, it's a duck, right? I didn't want to plant the idea that these might be different. These fries disappeared with the same rapidity as usual. In fact, Dog enjoyed the opportunity of sharing some with an envious friend.

There ya have it. French fries. The new health food.